As coaches for over 20 years, in businesses of all varieties, we’ve seen many examples of people who have concerns about someone else’s behavior; and yet, they themselves are seen and experienced as “the problem” in the office. How can that be? Let’s take a look at Janet. Janet is a confident and competent businesswoman who came to us on the brink of being let go. She was distressed and angry, and she was looking for an ally to figure…