Last week brought the stunning loss of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain by suicide. We know that there is pain in everyone’s life – some more visible than others.
So we want to take a moment to remind you that,
Take a moment to think about your life and how you treat yourself as you go through your moments, days, weeks, and months.
Your moments matter and if you’re going to matter in your own life, it’s important that you pay attention to your moments.
lean in to make a difference in the world,
we are all better for it.
The world needs you.
So, the world needs you to matter to yourself.
It needs you to respect who you are and where you are right now—even if your goal is to be somewhere else in your life. To honor the contribution you make while committing to doing things to get you to new opportunities to do more. To respect your need for rest, silence, connection, and love.
Pay attention to treating yourself like you matter in this world because we know you do.
- When you’re successful, acknowledge it to yourself.
And when you feel afraid, lonely, unsettled, or stupid—acknowledge that too. And acknowledge it with the gentleness you would offer someone you love deeply.
Hold yourself in high regard and say to yourself, “I can see that you’re afraid or feel stupid and I’m sorry. It’s hard. And, you matter. You will move through this.”
- Take care of your basic needs.
Pay attention to your hunger and thirst. Go to the bathroom when you need to go to the bathroom (seriously). Slow your pace and breathe as you walk down the hall.
It’s truly stunning the number of people who ignore their basic needs throughout the day. If you matter, your needs matter.
- Get a notebook, use your phone, tear off a few scraps of paper, and on and off throughout the day write down the things you’re doing well.
The things you are proud of. The things you didn’t think you’d do but did. They don’t have to be big or in any way meaningful to anyone else.
For us, they are sometimes getting out of bed after a crazy, personally challenging week, not snapping at a colleague who pushes our buttons, or staying present in a meeting that was tedious and boring. Notice yourself and what you do well.
- Look for small ways to give yourself a treat—just because.
Not a reward but a treat for being in this life and mattering in this life.
A few minutes on a deck overlooking a river near your office, 5 minutes to taste that latte you just bought, listening to the birds, noticing the clouds, laughing with a co-worker, hugging your partner or kids just a bit longer.
- Find ways to laugh.
With others would be best, but if that’s not possible, watch a Saturday Night Live routine that always makes you laugh, watch a show that’s funny and charming, join a group that plays well together, create a game night with friends.
When you laugh, you remember yourself and can gain perspective. You matter enough in that moment to soften.
You need you.
We want to remind you to matter to yourself and to love yourself. To help support you, we’ve created a worksheet to help you remember. Click here for the worksheet.
Please, please, please, if you’re worried about yourself as you read this, reach out to someone for support, call a therapist, or talk to a coach. If you feel suicidal, get to an emergency room, call a suicide hotline, or ask someone to stay with you until you can get support.
Hugs to you,
Linda, Stephanie, and Heather